Wednesday, April 13, 2011

The passing of time....

It hit me today that my little booger butt is going to be EIGHT months old this month.  EIGHT MONTHS!  I mentioned that to my momma today with these words: Holy cow, B is going to be 8 months, it is like things take forever and then time comes out of nowhere and just smacks you in the face!

Her response?  "Yep, today you're 25 and before you know you'll be 30, then 40, then 50."

I, politely, reminded her that no matter how old I get, she will always be 30 years older than me :)

Then on my way home (it is an hour and a half drive, so I get a lot of time to think!) I started thinking about how different my life is, how different my friendships are, how different my goals and dreams are from when I was in elementary school, middle school, high school, and even my "early" twenties!  So, I thought it would be fun to go down memory lane a bit and really break it down so it is here for me to look back on.....

Elementary School: My best friend was Candi (she goes by Candice now, and I still call her Candi haha) and she lived on a hog farm -- delightful, right?  That little (is was over 100 acres, still small from where I came from) farm was my own little fairy tale land, it was sooooo incredibly different from our house in town.  Friendships boiled down to who you could chat with at recess and who would dangle on the monkey bars with you; gosh I miss those days!  All I wanted to be in life was a mommy and a school teacher, pretty simple request, right?  And, my dreams?  Well they usually revolved around how many hours I spent at the pool in the summer or how many hours I could spend building a snow fort with my brother in the snow. 

Middle School: My sixth grade year, we merged with three other schools so there were a ton of new people to get to know!  (random side note, of all the people in my class in sixth grade, something like 95% of us graduated together -- in our class of 60-some)  Anywhooo, my best friends included: Heather (who is still one of my best friends!), Sarah, Candi, Ashley....honestly I still talk to all of these girls, but Heather and I are still super close.  Our friendships revolved around the excessive adoration of the newly found BOY and and the mutual hatred of the other new find in our lives, homework!  A little more drama than elementary school, but hey, I'd still take it over bills and such of these days!  My goals back then?  Hm, school teacher still ranked up there, but my eyes were opening to the fact that the world was much bigger than the little village that my dad was mayor of, it was more than just growing up, getting married, and having babies that would start the cycle all over again.  My dreams revolved around boys, and boys, and boys...and how to get out of doing my homework.

High School: Oh, wow!  My high school was full of drama!  I should say that one of my best friends was the boyfriend I maintained all four years, but honestly, other than the girls, my best friend was my boyfriend's best friend.  The one that I emotionally cheated on him with....for most of the four years we were together.  Go ahead, hate on me, but I was young and didn't know how to handle a relationship that wasn't working.  Our friendship came from so many things, but most likely, the roots of it came from the fact that we had much deeper feelings but had *no* idea how to handle those feelings.  Goals?  Oh gosh, this is really when my goals became very varied!  One day I wanted to be a school teacher, then a librarian, then an interior designer, a chef, a bakery owner...the list went on and on and on.  Dreams were filled with boys, parties, and still trying to figure out how to get of all that homework!!

Early 20's: My best friends from high school and I are still friends, we have the friendship that always grounds us; we can go a while without speaking and then all at once, within seconds, we become the giggling group of girls that bond over everything under the sun.  That group of girls expanded though, and the girls that I worked with slid in.  Our friendships were built from late night gab sessions in our first apartments, drinking wayyyy more than we ever should have, and bonding over bills/work/etc.  We were becoming adults together, finding our place in the world and deciding that our places included growing up next to each other so that we can share all of our life experiences.  My goals have changed with the tides these last few years.  When I was working, I threw my everything into it and made that job my goal, I shaped my life, and to an extent my future, around that place.  All the goals that have recently came back (becoming a baker, a librarian, something that is a true passion) took a very far back seat in my mind.  I wonder where those will take me someday....As for my dreams?  Well, my dreams these days revolve about settling down some day (hopefully soon...) and actually being passionate with what I spend my days doing.

Well this was fun!  I think everyone should do this!!!  I love looking back through my journals and seeing what took precedence in my life at any given time....There's a journal I saw once that was really neat, it was like a five year question journal that asked you a question every day and had spots to answer it on the same day for the following four years.  If anyone knows where I can find it, def let me know!  And, if you happen upon this and post something similar on your blog, comment me with the link!  I'd love to see some responses!!

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